Your Lack of Confidence May Not be a Lack of Confidence.It Might be a Lack of Evidence.

One of the first assignments I give every coaching client is deceptively simple:

Create five STAR stories.

Think of moments when you made something better, solved a problem, influenced a decision, navigated a challenge, or achieved a meaningful result.

Describe the Situation, Task, Action, and Result—supported by facts whenever possible.

Simple assignment.

Remarkably difficult.

Not because my clients haven't accomplished impressive things.

Because so many accomplished people have a hard time seeing their own accomplishments clearly.

I hear versions of these statements all the time:

"It wasn't that big of a deal."

"I just figured it out as I went."

"I don't want to make it sound like I'm bragging."

And every time, I hear the same thing underneath:

Someone who has learned to be humble, collaborative, and capable—but hasn't learned how to fully acknowledge the value they bring.

Let's be clear:

Humility is a strength.

Being a great teammate is a strength.

Giving others credit is a strength.

But those strengths should never require you to erase your own contribution.

Doing something well does not make it "no big deal."

Figuring something out does not mean it was easy.

And accurately describing your impact is not bragging.

It is evidence.

Many of the women I coach are preparing for a promotion, a leadership opportunity, or a career transition. They have years of experience and countless examples of creating value.

Yet when asked, "Tell me about a time you made a difference," they struggle.

Not because they lack stories.

Because they haven't captured them.

Over time, we forget the details. We remember that we worked hard, but we forget the decisions we made, the obstacles we overcame, the relationships we built, and the results we created.

That's why I encourage every client to build an Evidence Bank.

I call it a HYPE File:

H — Honor

Y — Your

P — Professional

E — Evidence

Your HYPE File is not about inflating your accomplishments.

It is not a highlight reel designed to make you look impressive.

It is about honoring the truth of what you have contributed.

Your HYPE File might include:

• STAR stories from projects you're proud of

• Feedback from leaders, colleagues, and clients

• Metrics that demonstrate your impact

• Problems you solved

• Challenges you navigated

• Difficult conversations you handled well

• Moments where you influenced, improved, or transformed something

• Recognition, awards, or thank-you notes

• Lessons learned and moments of growth

Think of it as your personal evidence bank.

When confidence feels shaky, open the file.

When you're asking for a promotion, open the file.

When you're preparing for an interview, definitely open the file.

When you need a reminder of what you're capable of, open the file.

Because confidence isn't built by convincing yourself you are talented.

Confidence is built by having the evidence to remind yourself that you already are.

And don't wait until you need it.

Start today.

Whether you're early in your career, leading a team, or sitting in the C-suite, build this file year after year.

Your future self will thank you.

We spend so much time documenting work for everyone else.

Start documenting it for yourself.

Your accomplishments deserve to be remembered.

Your impact deserves to be named.